You’re sick? You look so good, though.
When people find out about my medical condition, they often say, “But you look so good. ” I’m never sure what they mean by that, but I assume part of it has to do with confusion. They don’t understand how someone that looks good can be sick because they’re focused on visual cues — whether the person appears pale, tired, etc. Unfortunately, some people get so focused on visual cues that they think their loved one is exaggerating about their condition. “Well, if I can’t see it, then it must not exist.”
I have been fortunate enough to have friends/family that are understanding, and that realize I’m not just a whiner. Although they can’t see my pain, fatigue, etc., they don’t question its existence. They are good about asking how I feel, and making accommodations when they can. If I tell them I’m too tired to ride an hour to see them, for example, they don’t push me to do it anyway. They’ll come to me instead. If I tell them that my knees hurt too much to go shopping, they don’t suggest that I pop some pills and deal with it. They offer to push me in a wheelchair or move the shopping trip to another date. They do this, in part, because they know that how I look (or sound on the phone) does not reflect how I feel. For that, I am very fortunate.
This entry was posted on Saturday, February 7th, 2009 at 8:33 pm and is filed under EDS Stuff, Misc. Thoughts on EDS & Chronic Illness. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.
6:58 pm on August 23rd, 2009
I’m sorry to hear that….people do tend to be human and forget the simple things in life. One being looks isnt everything and the fact that it maters what’s in a persons heart first and foremost. A good person can be over looked just bc of a problem they might have. I wish you all the luck and hopefully you find that person who can look past your good looks and into your heart. And if the illness you have can not be reversed then I pray you have more better days than bad. It’s great to have a loving family around you so that you can keep going. Good luck with your future and whatever you do never stop smiling.
4:27 pm on June 22nd, 2011
Hey there I seriously loved looking at your blog article. The only challenge I have with health relevant sujects such as the one you put up about is that generally there are so many totally different opinions of what is correct and what is incorrect. I absolutely understand that from time to time we go with what research or experts say. Having said that, then arrives a blog post like the one you have which totally makes sense and makes me want to experiment with what you mentioned. Regardless, thanks for writing and I have your web pages saved so I can come back in the future! Have a excellent day!